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All Da King's Men

Finally, Good News On Unemployment

By Da King Published: March 5, 2011

Republicans took away the Democrats 4-year long congressional majority in January 2011. During those 4 years of total Democrat control of Congress, we lost about 6.7 million jobs and ran up like $5 trillion in debt. The numbers are so crazy high that I can't even keep track anymore. Good job, Democrats. If we ever need kamikaze pilots for a future war, we'll call you.

In February 2011, the first full month of GOP House leadership, our country finally had a decent jobs report. 222,000 private sector jobs were created. It takes about 125,000 jobs to keep up with population growth, so we made a real jobs gain, finally. Unemployment dropped to 8.9%.

That must sting, eh Democrats ? I know, I know, it's all a big coincidence. I probably wouldn't even have mentioned the difference between Democrat and Republican job performance if Democrats hadn't repeated their line about the economy losing 700,000 jobs per month under Bush about 100 billion times over the last two years. Democrats have apparently forgotten all about who was running Congress then. It was, as I said, the DEMOCRATS (but maybe they were all wearing Bush masks so we couldn't tell they were Democrats. I'm not sure. The mainstream media seems to think so).

Our economy has added about 1.5 million private sector jobs over the past year, but as I said, population growth accounts for....ALL of those jobs (125,000 x 12 = 1.5 million). We basically broke even over the last year, but now we appear to be entering what economists call a "virtuous cycle". My dear clueless liberal friends, knowing nothing of economics, may ask "what is a virtuous cycle ?" Oh, you won't like the answer, dear libs. It goes against EVERYTHING you mistakenly believe in. Check it out, dudes. You might want to take a bong hit or two in order to steady your nerves first:

The figures suggest the economy has entered a healthier phase typical of what economists call a virtuous cycle: Americans are spending more, which raises corporate profits, which leads to hiring and then more spending and growth.

"Wha...wha...what ???", scream my dear clueless liberal friends in unison. "Corporate profits lead to hiring and then more spending and growth, and then more hiring, and then more spending and growth, and then...??? Wha...wha...what ??? Corporate profits ???? It cannot be !", rage the libs. "We were told that CORPORATE PROFITS ARE EVIL !!!!! We were told this by college professors with ponytails, who wear suit jackets with patches on the elbows and everything. They should know !!! They studied Che, and Trotsky !!! We HATE CORPORATE PROFITS !!!! We start foaming at the mouth if someone even says the word "corporate" in our presence...and now you're trying to tell us corporate profits are GOOD ? What manner of heresy is this ? Did you hear this from Sean Hannity ?"

I know it's a shock, dear clueless liberal friends, but it's true. This country relies on corporate profits for our jobs and our wealth. All the money to fund all those government entitlement programs you like comes directly from corporate profits. I realize Oliver Stone never said so in a Hollywood movie,...but profit is good. Hey, ask Charlie Sheen. He may be a crazy, drug-addled Truther, but he knows a thing or two about profits. How do you think he buys his hookers and blow ? He doesn't use food stamps, you know.

You see, my dear clueless liberal friends, the bad things happen when there are no corporate profits. That's what happened over the last few years. The corporate profits went bye-bye, and so did lots of your jobs. Corporate LOSSES are the real bad guy, my friends. That's why Da King here always promotes policies to keep those corporate profits coming, and it has nothing to do with me being "only for the rich" or against "the little guy". Those are just stupid liberal talking points that don't amount to a cup of warm spit. Those talking points are meant to distract you from the truth, and the truth is, without corporations making profits, the rest doesn't matter, because the government will be broke and the people will be jobless. Job One in this country is to make our businesses profitable. After that, everything else will fall into line. This is not a Republican, Democratic, or Libertarian talking point. It's just a basic fact.

But I digress. What was I talking about ? Oh yeah, last month's unemployment figures. If we keep gaining around 200,000 jobs per month, every month without fail, it will take about...six years to get unemployment back to where it was before the Democrats took over Congress in 2007. That means our virtuous cycle isn't nearly virtuous enough, and these soaring gas prices could stall the recovery just as it appears to be kicking into gear. As my pal the Reverend says, if only the Middle East wasn't located right on top of our oil. How inconvenient. I'd also like to thank liberals once again for killing domestic oil exploration in this country. Instead, they have us putting our food supply in our gas tanks, another brilliant move. Now food prices are rising as well, not to mention the fact that ethanol must be subsidized by the taxpayers because it isn't cost effective.

Sometimes I wonder how we have any jobs left at all after the government gets involved. Then again, the Cuyahoga River doesn't catch on fire anymore, so the government does get a few things right. I'm a Libertarian, but I'm not a fanatic about it. The government has it's uses, as long as you keep it on a leash.

I'm just rambling today, aren't I ? Sorry. I guess I've subjected y'all to enough for now. Have a nice weekend.



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