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All Da King's Men

President NewsCycle

By Da King Published: June 8, 2010

A couple posts back, I said President Obama reacts to the daily newscyle, tailoring his responses to whatever criticisms are being offered up on the telly the previous day. It's part of his perpetual campaign mode. As further proof of my theory, the president has been criticized by the media recently for being too detached and not forceful enough in responding to the BP oil spill. Soooo, right on cue, President NewsCycle said this yesterday:

“I was down there a month ago, before most of these talkin’ heads were even paying attention to the gulf. A month ago I was meeting with fishermen down there, standin’ in the rain talking about what a potential crisis this could be. and I don’t sit around just talking to experts because this is a college seminar, we talk to these folks because they potentially have the best answers, so I know whose ass to kick.”

Tough talk from the prez, but it also came out yesterday that President NewsCycle has not spoken directly to BP CEO Tony Hayward since the oil spill occurred on April 20th. If Obama wants to know whose "ass to kick," maybe he could start with THE HEAD OF BRITISH PETROLEUM. Or maybe that's too obvious. This doesn't seem like the time to only communicate via the grapevine. NewsCycle could have at least invited Hayward to Paul McCartney Night at the White House, where the President was working on oil spill and cleanup solutions with such noted experts as Sir Paul, Stevie Wonder, Elvis Costello, the Jonas Brothers, Herbie Hancock, Dave Grohl, Faith Hill, Emmylou Harris, Jerry Seinfeld, and others. BP CEO Hayward did say he has communicated with Obama's "key lieutenants," which I assume means NBC news anchors and New York Times writers.

President NewsCycle, not missing a beat, offered a poor excuse to NBC's Matt Lauer this morning for not talking to the BP CEO:

"I have not spoken to him directly," [NewsCycle] told Lauer. "Here's the reason. Because my experience is, when you talk to a guy like a BP CEO, he's gonna say all the right things to me. I'm not interested in words. I'm interested in actions."

Riiight. This is what's known as...Obama talking crap. What NewsCycle should have talked to Hayward about, multiple times by now, IS what actions BP is going to take, and why they've been so slow and unprepared in dealing with this spill. There is no person more singularly qualified to put pressure on BP than the President Of The United States, aka, the most powerful man in the world. I'd also say NewsCycle should ask how the government can help, but I can't think of much of anything the government has done right lately.

Speaking of "say(ing) all the right words," NewsCycle did tell Matt Lauer that he would have fired the BP CEO by now, as if that's going to speed things along somehow.

As yet more evidence of Obama's nonstop campaign mode, President Newscycle is hitting the road today to push ObamaCare, a bill that has already passed. The prez is still trying to convince America his health care reform is a good idea, and so far, America is not buying it. NewsCycle will be hosting a tele-townhall meeting at a senior center in Maryland. If everything works out well, maybe one of those senior citizens will come up with a way to cap the oil spill and clean up the Gulf Of Mexico. One can always hope.

Or maybe Obama can ask around for solutions at tonight's Congressional Picnic at the White House.

In other developments, after White House reporter Helen Thomas said the Jews should "get the hell out of Palestine" and go back to Poland, Russia, or wherever they come from, President NewsCycle boldly termed Thomas' remarks "offensive," thus losing a few popularity points with Muslim voters and anti-semites like Helen Thomas, the United Nations, and my blogger bud The Reverend.

Given a chance to interview the leader of the free world, NBC's Matt Lauer didn't waste the opportunity. He brought up another burning issue of worldwide importance by asking the Prez his opinion on the blown call that ruined Detroit Tigers pitcher Armando Galaragga's perfect game against the Cleveland Indians. Obama said baseball should take a look at using the instant replay, and also said.........ah, forget it. Who gives a crap ? The Gulf Coast is dying.

But I was hoping Lauer would ask the President whether he prefers boxers or briefs. A nation anxiously, um, hangs in the balance. We need direction, Mr. President. Without your wisdom, we are lost.

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