1. Six general managers lined up in front of LeBron, who stands beside a silver tray with one rose on it.
2. Sound bites of the GMs insisting that they have pursued this courtship "for the right reasons."
3. LeBron choking up, with tears in his eyes, as he says this is the toughest decision he has had to make, because he has feelings for all the teams.
4. Russell Hantz charging in to insist that he is the greatest basketball player of all time and that he should be the big winner in this competition. (Oh, sorry, wrong show.)
5. The special interview a year from now in which LeBron and the team he chose try to explain all the reasons why their relationship went wrong -- capped by Chris Harrison having to interrupt to say, "We don't care about the dog."