☰ Menu
Friends, Food and Fun in the Kitchen

Good fortune and good laughs will be yours....

By Lisa Abraham Published: January 20, 2012

A Union City, Calif. company has come up with its answer to the tired, cliche sayings inside fortune cookies.

iLLfortunes is offering a new kind of fortune in their cookies. To better understand them, here are a sampling of their fortunes:

•      Your likeness to a hobbit will not serve you in the dating world.

•       Your pet is planning to eat you.

•       Prozac is planning a long term relationship with you.

•       Counting sheep is not meant for the purpose of arousal. Get help.

•       The voices in your head think you’re an idiot.

If you are still laughing, like I was, you can purchase them at The cookie are $12 for 20 and come backed in a Chinese food container.

Chinese New Year is Jan. 23. Might be a good way to usher in the Year of the Dragon.



  • Main Blog Promo
  • Cavs Blog Promo
  • Browns Blog Promo
  • Indians Blog Promo
  • Beer Blog Promo
  • Fracking Blog Promo
  • High School Blog Promo
  • Zips Blog Promo
  • Akron Dish Food Blog
Prev Next