You can start your holiday shopping now. The 2013 Neiman Marcus Christmas catalog has arrived.
Here are the fantasy gifts you can implore Santa Baby for this year:
-- A his-and-hers outdoor entertainment system featuring a 201-inch screen that hides underground when you’re not watching Jersey Shore reruns, as well as speakers made from marine-grade components and a DirecTV satellite and DVD management system loaded with 300 movies. It’s all controlled by mini iPads – one for each of you, of course. Price: $1.5 million.
-- A portable falconry camp designed to let you pursue the sport around the world. Included are a portable mew (that’s a structure to house the birds, in case you’re not up on your falconry lingo), a 20-karat gold-plated falcon perch and custom-made campaign furniture. Price: $150,000.
-- A Ciclotte exercise bike with a vague resemblance to a 19th-century unicycle. It will look great next to your in-ground swimming pool. Price: a relative bargain at $11,000.
-- A 25-carat rough Forevermark diamond, complete with a world tour representing its journey from deep beneath the ocean floor to your finger. The gift includes a visit to the De Beers heaquarters in London, a private tour of the crown jewels and dinner with the CEOs of De Beers and Forevermark, a visit to the site off the coast of Namibia where the diamond was mined, and a trip to New York to meet with your jewelry designer. Price: $1.85 million.
-- An overnight stay in the Glass House, the weekend residence of architect and art patron Philip Johnson in New Canaan, Conn. Bonus: You get to invite up to 10 friends for dinner. Price: $30,000.
-- The Wild Child, a motorcycle hand-built by fabricator Indian Larry for the Discovery Channel’s Biker Build-Off series. To quote the catalog, it features Indian Larry’s “signature dished tank, root beer metal flake paint, twisted down tube frame, and a truly unique engine with a shovelhead front cylinder, panhead rear, and jockey shift.” I don’t know what any of that means. Price: $750,000.
-- A limited-edition Jeff Koons sculpture, Dom Perignon’s Balloon Venus, which represents “the link between past, present, and future vintages of Dom Perignon, as well as the continuity of the human experience symbolized by Venus.” No mention of whether it comes with champagne. Price: $20,000.
-- The Neiman Marcus 2014 Aston Martin Vanquish Volante, one of only 10 of the sports cars in the world. You can do your best James Bond imitation in this Seychelles Blue beauty, which supposedly can reach 180 miles per hour. Price, $344,500, but you’ll have to wait till Oct. 23 to order. At noon, to be precise.