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Blog of Mass Destruction

I Thought We Were Listening, But We're Not

By The Reverend Published: May 7, 2009

Republicans have formed the National Council for a New America(whatever that name means), in an attempt to connect with Americans again. The GOP has lost, badly, in the last two elections and now only 21% of Americans are willing to identify themselves as Republicans. Something constructive had to be undertaken by GOP leaders to at least try to salvage what looks like a sinking political Titantic.

So W's brother, Jebby, and Willard Romney and Eric Cantor convened a pizza party where they listened to regular Republicans, to then later consider what people said..... a bit of interactive soul searching, as it were....which would then, presumably, lead to a New America, or something.

You know you're in trouble, bigtime, when even a listening tour is rejected by Comedien King Limbaugh.

Warning: The following video will be embarassing to watch for Republicans and conservatives who are looking for a Republican Party comeback. Embarrassment is good for the soul, at times. On other occasions, say, like, when a person willingly self-inflicts embarrassment....then....not so much....

As I've mentioned before in Wingnut Wars, the conservative movement has a serious problem with radio entertainer, Rush Limbaugh. Comedien King has developed a very lucrative radio-talk business for himself. Comedien has never been my cup of tea, because I prefer, you know, coffee, but this is America "where at least I know I'm free".... to support torture and war crimes.....or listen to Comedien King Limbaugh.

Let me explain the embarrassment here. I've heard for years and years that the Republican Party is the party of the tough guys, the warriors, the defenders, the patriots. It's not true of course, but it's what I've heard. How tough does House Minority Whip, Eric Cantor, sound at the end of the above video?

Well, he's not tough enough to defend his own National Council for a New America "listening tour" if Rush says Republicans and conservatives don't need to "listen." Comedien King has somewhere between 10 and 20 million listeners. How are Republican leaders going to successfully battle a 65 million vote-getting, very popular, President Obama if they piss their pants so easily when Comedien King sternly bounces his disapproving rolls of fat around in their direction?

So sad. The monkey on the Republican Party's back, I mean. And Comedien King ain't no svelte package, you know what I'm sayin'?. Usually, addiction this bad is only witnessed in crack whores and the like. Rarely have I witnessed dependency so saddening, so disheartening, so pitiful. This is intervention territory.

Alas, The Reverend interventionist is in.

In order to successfully remove the very large monkey, Comedien King, from the backs of Republicans, it will be necessary to take small steps at first. I would recommend, in Eric Cantor's case, starting off with his family dog because the family dog doesn't, you know, talk back. Cantor should practice telling his dog, "no." The Virginia representative can then move to stomping his feet while simultaneously saying "no", raising his voice ever so much each time.

After Eric Cantor has strengthened his will and his spine getting tough with his family dog (and this would work with any

wingnut conservative, mileage varies), he can move on to, like, checkout counter people, bank tellers, waitresses...and the like. Cantor is no Governator, not exactly an imposing figure, he'll probably have to practice in front of a mirror to make it all seem like credible sternness.

A couple years of practice will prepare Cantor for open disagreement with his own family members. Hey, addiction is a tough nut to crack. One day at a time kind of stuff. But if the "listening, not-listening" Cantor stays the course....eventually, perhaps in a decade, he'll be able to simply say "no", even to Comedien King Limbaugh.

Nancy Reagan, a nice lady, used to say, "Just Say No", when drug addiction threatened. Might I suggest a new, new, National Council for a New America name that would be more appropriate in these dangerous times of heavy dependency?

The National Council of Recovering Dittoheads for a New America.

Proudly, then, with heads held high, the Council can go forth to our nation's pizza parlors, boldly and loudly proclaiming..."yes, we're listening."

What a great day that will be.



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