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Blog of Mass Destruction

MoveOn Head Attacks Tea Party Foot

By The Reverend Published: October 27, 2010

Watch how a liberal domestic terrorist carries out one of's evil schemes to destroy our country. Quite frankly, I've never seen anything like it....

How much clearer could it be?

A woman volunteering for, a communist, socialist, marxist, Maoist group bent on destroying America from the inside, donned a blonde wig and headed over to the Rand Paul get together to present him with an "Employee of the Month" award on behalf of the fictitious, satirical group, RepubliCorp. Her poisonous plan was to get a picture with Rand Paul as she gave him the so-called award. Our enemies are always coming up with ingenious new ways to place America's most Patriotic in harm's way.

She was wrestled to the ground before she could pull the rip cord on her RepubliCorps award.....and it's a good thing too.....that handmade award was reported, by anonymous sources of course, to have the latest Iranian-made detonators embedded within the layers of cardboard and Magic Marker.

It goes without saying, this was a domestic terrorism event. Just as President Obama refused to release the "state secrets" pictures of American soldiers raping young male detainees in the Iraqi resort known as Abu Ghraib, claiming that by releasing those pictures, our troops would be placed at too, Rand Paul Tea Partiers refused to allow a MoveOn terrorist to snap a picture with Rand Paul for fear that the morale of Rand Paul's "troops" would be put at risk.

Don't forget, we're at war.

The first lesson to take away from the MoveOn head attack on Tea Party feet is the bravery and courage of our Tea Party Patriot men. It's not often that five or six men are brave, or daring, enough to capture and detain a dangerous 120 pound woman. But these Paul Patriots are not your garden variety Baggers. They are fearless in the face of the opposition.

So, five brave Patriots.....fearful that a propaganda picture of mass destruction was about to be snapped....slowly surrounded the MoveOn terrorist, Lauren Valle....just as Rand Paul's vehicle arrived on the scene. But the RepubiCorps-awardee from the MoveOn enemy was a wily rascal. I don't know how this foot attacker did it, but she managed to make it look like those five men had put her in an armlock and wrestled her to the pavement.

Onlookers said they had never seen anything like it. The Brave Randian Patriots explained later to unnamed reporters who are at this moment still maintaining their anonymity for fear of reprisal from other potential feet attackers.....told unnamed sources that Ms. Valle, somehow, had armlocked herself and fallen to the pavement taking, at least, four of our Bravest with her.

That's when the latest enemy tactic was unleashed.

Adding phony insult to injury, Ms. Valle, the MoveOn enemy, then placed her head under a man's white sneakered foot at the very same time that that foot was pushing down hard on the edge of the roadway.....undoubtedly to better balance himself as he and his four future Presidential Medal of Honor winners kept Rand Paul safe from that dangerous RepubliCorps photo-shoot.

Sure, in the video it appears as if the man whose foot was attacked by a MoveOn actually doing the....well....attacking. But as we've found out recently, your lying eyes can't really be trusted any longer.....not since 9-11.....because "everything has changed".....apparently even the laws of physics and the way a video camera angle captures "inaccurate" images. Hey, it's a different kind of war.....with enemies unlike any other in history.

The good news here is that another new enemy tactic has been exposed. And what an insidious tactic it is, huh?. Who could have ever imagined that our enemies would resort to attacking Patriotic feet with their Enemy heads? Surely not this blogger.

See?....our enemies are relentlessly conniving to come up with new ways to exploit our freedoms....the same freedoms that both Al-Qaeda and MoveOn hate. In this, our latest example of the evil of our enemy, even our freedom to see things clearly with our own eyes is being threatened. If our enemy can make it look like a foot is stomping a head when in actuality it is the head which, clearly, attacked the foot.....what else are they capable of? How can we ever be safe again?

Tough questions....I know.

To find the appropriate answers, we must turn to the wisdom of our nation's Greatest Defender and Protector....George W. Bush. Paraphrasing the latest Einsteinian commentary from America's Bravest Commander Guy.....

'The one thing I am most proud of, having honored all of you by being your president for 8 years, is that I kept all of you safe during my presidency. I realize that some think I didn't keep you safe on 9-11, and during the anthrax attacks...but those who say that are some of the same people trying to trick us today into believing that Ms. Valle's head didn't attack that Brave Tea Party Patriot's foot down in Kentucky.

...fool me once, shame on, shame on you. Fool me, you can’t get fooled again."

Words to live by in such a dangerous time.



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