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Blog of Mass Destruction

"One-Thousandth of One Percent"

By The Reverend Published: May 13, 2010

You know that growing massive oil spill down in the Gulf....the one that keeps growing because very smart people can't figure out how to stop the mile-deep leak?

Well, Senator Mary Landrieu (D-LA) wants to reassure Americans that all the huffing and puffing over the growing spill by alarmist environmental types should be tempered by the facts about offshore and deep water oil drilling.

"We've drilled 4000 deep wells in the Gulf in the last 20 years. We drill 120 deep wells in the world every year."

See? We drill these deep water oil wells all the time, Landrieu states. The senator is implying that out of all those thousands of offshore wells, BP's recent blowup and subsequent spillage is simply a rare exception.

Not so bad after all. Pretty good batting average....all things considered.

But then, the tool of the oil energy down in Louisiana, Senator Landrieu, decided to take it a tad further....

"The record will show that from 1947 until 2009, 175,813 barrels of oil have been spilled out of 16 billion produced. That is one-thousandth of one percent of total production."

During Landrieu's interview on the Ed Shultz show yesterday, it was clear that the senator was doing her best to show support for the offshore oil business. In order to do the bidding of those who finance her election campaigns, Ms. Landrieu had to at least try to minimize the BP tragedy. Landrieu chose to use the mathematical averaging method.

16 billion barrels of oil pumped out of the Gulf since 1947, only 175,813 barrels spilled. Good job deep well oil drillers. Safety awards all around.

The Gulf of Mexico oil rig accident and spill have prompted the federal Minerals Management Service (MMS) to postpone an awards ceremony scheduled for May 3 that honors oil company offshore safety achievements.

The semi-submersible drilling rig that exploded early last week was owned by Transocean Ltd and was under lease to BP. BP is a finalist for one of the awards, according to the MMS website.

As I watched Mary Landrieu's defense of Big Oil last night, I there anything that U.S. senators will not say as they whore themselves out to the corporations who pay for their D.C. Dance tickets?

I think the answer

Let's apply Mary Landrieu's mathematical averaging formula to other devastating tragedies...

Hiroshima and Nagasaki had the exceptional benefit of being the only two spots on earth where atomic bombs were dropped. 200,000 Japanese were slaughtered when those two bombs were dropped.....but hey, it's not that bad. How many atomic and nuclear weapons do we have in the world today? Lots. And those WMD-nukes haven't killed anyone lately.

Total nukes in the world today....

"....there are now nearly 8,000 active nuclear warheads and more than 22,000 total nuclear warheads in the world in 2010."

22,000 total nuclear warheads today....divided into 2, the total number of nukes dropped on, you know, people....equals .009 percent. Miniscule percentage at best. Conclusion....using Mary Landrieu's astute evaluation method? Nukes are basically safe and the world population has very little to concern itself about when it comes to total numbers of nukes now in the world.

And don't forget the jobs we would lose if nukes were, somehow, eliminated.

How about that pesky HIV virus? We've been told repeatedly, I'm sure by liberal hand wringers, that HIV is a serious threat to the world, one which requires serious concern and attention by world leaders. But is it..really?

More than 25 million people have died of AIDS since 1981. But not so fast......that number is misleading if Senator Landrieu's mathematical averaging system is applied.

How many people in the world? 6.7 billion.

Let's do the Landrieu math....25 million divided by 6.7 billion equals .3%. That's even less than the triggers of Dick Cheney's 1 Percent Doctrine. And I didn't account for the total number of people who have lived on the earth since the actual percentage of AIDS-related deaths is much smaller than .3%.

AIDS is not that big of a deal, then, right? .3%, or less, know...looked at with a much wider mathematical just not that significant. Small potatoes. Nothing to be alarmed about.

Political whoring for corporate money, of course, is nothing new. It's as American as apple pie. But the depths of the obscenity witnessed in Landrieu's math-averaging approach yesterday was particularly, you know, slutty.

Just sayin'.

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