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Blog of Mass Destruction

The Conservative Bowel Movement

By The Reverend Published: March 1, 2009


I caught a couple hours of the Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) Friday afternoon. I heard Mike Pence (R-IN) act all stern as he spewed forth a bunch of nonsense. I saw Mike Huckabee use some of his old-fashioned Christian bile in yet another attempt to be humorous. Lead balloon. Speaker after speaker came forward and yet not one new idea. Not one. Sad, really.

The present day conservative movement began with Richard Nixon's southern strategy. Baiting white Americans with fear of the darkies. Southern states just loved it. "Victimized" whites had a political party that represented their perceived victimhood. Ronnie Reagan carried this torch forward and attracted the likes of the Moral Majority by throwing out a few more morality dog bones. Karl Rove and his pet, George W. Bush, took this mess to it's logical conclusion through 8 years of deception and illusion.

That logical conclusion was witnessed last evening in Mr. Rush Limbaugh's keynote speaker address to this year's CPAC gathering. Transcript.

The conclusion? The modern conservative movement is no longer simply on life support.....I'm sad to announce, it passed away.

CNN carried Mr. Limbaugh's long "speech" late yesterday afternoon....commercial free! Yep, CNN treated a hate-radio emcee like he was the president of the U.S. That, in itself, is worthy of a separate blog post. But setting that aside...if anyone watched Rush yesterday, what did he have to offer with his lengthy ramble?

I heard three things that I thought might resemble concepts, you know, evidence of brain cell function. Tax cuts....I heard Rush say that one once. Subsequently, I heard the words "liberty" and "freedom." Anyone out there not down with liberty and freedom? Anyone?

Rush Limbaugh is now the de-facto leader of the leftover sewage from the modern conservative movement. And how appropriate. Limbaugh, as he demonstrated in his "speech", is a hate-mongering gutter snipe who is so in love with himself, for yet unknown reasons, that he can't help but fill an hour plus talk with multiple references to himself. Masturbatory would be another applicable word of description.

Poking fun at President Obama and the Democrats by spraying noxious bile all around the room for over an hour, while simultaneously offering up absolutely nothing in the form of a new idea...represented the-long hoped-for bowel movement of America, so to speak, ridding the body politic of the waste product that is all that remains of the modern conservative movement.

All that's left is the....wiping part.

Here's a few of the lowlights.....don't forget to hold your nose.....

Then the flush....."the only way we will be successful is if we listen to Rush Limbaugh."...



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