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Blog of Mass Destruction

The Job Interviews Are Over

By The Reverend Published: November 2, 2008

Imagine that you are looking to hire a new manager for your workplace operation. The departing manager has done a terrible job and should have been let go earlier. You had given serious consideration to firing the old manager, but decided not to because a third of the workers he managed still liked him, and rules on firing managers presented potentially damaging problems for your company. Now the old manager is finally moving on leaving your operation in a state of decline in terms of production, profits, and worker morale.

There's no one to blame for the departing manager but yourself, after all, you hired him in the first place.

What to do now? After making such a bad mistake in hiring the now departing manager a number of years are hesitant to hire a new manager, afraid to make a similar mistake. You're a bit gun shy.

You decide to take a different approach to filling the vacant managerial slot. You take applications, you do your due diligence distilling the applicants down to the two best qualified and then you instruct those two applicants to produce a two hour long video on why you should hire them and what they would do, if hired, to make your business operation a safer work place, more efficient, more profitable, and your workers more content and productive.

Based on those two hire your new person.

That's what America has been doing the last couple of months....reviewing the videos of the two remaining job applicants. Americans don't sit down in their home offices and ask questions of the two applicants for president.....we review videos. We review them on our computer screens, we review them on our teevee screens. We analyze the 30 second video bytes, the even shorter YouTube clips, the "journalist' interviews, the 30 minute infomercials, the 90 minute debates.

This is what we do now. Yes, we read policy proposals and study biographic information.....but we do our reviewing, and I suggest, deciding, based on our video reviews.

What have those video reviews informed us about our two remaining applicants for the job of the presidency?

I would suggest that John McCain's video application kind of resembles the new videographic form seen in the "Blair Witch Diaries." A frenetic style, flitting from one scene to the next, hard to follow at times, disjointed, one scene seemingly contradicting another, others confusing and muddled, still others filled with unexplained gimmickry and unintelligible props. On occasion, the John McCain video did drop clues about what he would try to do as our next national 'manager.' Many of those clues, however, reminded the reviewers of the previous 'manager's' working style. Reviewers have been frustated watching the clips....torn between this veteran manager's service in the past and his apparent lack of focus and judgment in making his video for the presidency.

Beginning with John McCain's early primary win, we witnessed a poorly produced and conducted 'video'. McCain wasted his invaluable head start in the national campaign while the Democrats were still deciding which applicant would be sent on to the big show. The Arizona senator waited too long to attempt to frame his opponent. McCain lacked a clear message of what he would do as president, and when he finally did find his message....too much of it resembled the policy proposals of the least approved of American president in history, George W. Bush.

After wasting the first half of his video application, John McCain seemed to panic. His opponent, Barack Obama, united his party in Denver....both Clinton's jumped on board....and Obama's acceptance speech in an outdoor stadium with 80,000 reviewers attending wowed tens of millions of other reviewers sitting at home. McCain, in his first executive decision as national manager, acted hastily and apparently without due diligence, and hired Governor Sarah Palin as his co-manager running mate, the very next day.

A truncated GOP Convention consisting of patriotic military glitz combined with a cocky, sassy and rude speech by his co-star.....was followed by a 10 day campaign of lies about bridges and reformers which in turn led later to four lost debates, embarassing and telling journalist interviews....a phony suspension of the video process....smearing by association attempts....more lies....and finally a climax
of desperation in the totally unexplainable Joe the Plumber.

Barack Obama began his video with his narrow victory over another worthy applicant, Hillary Clinton. He worked hard and stayed on message, he didn't hide from the potentially devastating Rev. Wright association, instead he took the opportunity to speak clearly and brilliantly about race relations. The entire application was covered with the same message of unity, hope, strength, confidence and the promise that is America. Obama's cool, calm, and consistent message and demeanor was a welcome contrast to McCain's erratic campaign, yet Obama didn't back down from a fight either....delivering devastating blows exposing the hypocrisy and inconsistency of his opponent, continually linking him with the previous manager.

Obama's video application has been received broadly and with rave reviews, even from folks who usually don't review Democratic applications. Even conservative Republicans have been encouraging others to hire Mr. Obama for the job. Obama's goal of forming a new voting coalition in America appears to have been accomplished.

The applications are in....they've been reviewed....the process of determining who the next 'company manager' will be....will be over in about 60 hours. Based on your extensive video reviewing....

Who would you hire?



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