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What To Listen For Tonight

By The Reverend Published: November 2, 2010

Just as the rotted, stinking corpse of corporate media disinformed and propagandized Americans into supporting the international crime of Iraq, stenographically repeating the Dick's lies....so too, the disgusting corpse of corporate media has disinformed and propagandized Americans about the old-but-new extremist right, who identify themselves today as the never-before-seen, "grassroots" Tea Party.

When this repellant media "reports" tonight on the midterm results, listen for how often the Tea Party is lifted up as the new way forward....or some such drivel. Watch and listen carefully to Veteran Media Assh*les....the Fluffster and Wolfie come to mind.....who will undoubtedly attempt to mainstream the extreme.

None of the Villagers will say much, if anything, about how the new "grassroots" would like to force all pregnancies to term, rape or incest not withstanding.....remodel Social Security by ending it....repeal several Constitutional amendments....militarize the borders....eliminate unemployment insurance and the minimum wage.....and my favorite....return to fiscal responsibility by borrowing another $4 trillion and eliminating the estate tax on the richest .2% of Americans.

None of those extreme positions or obvious contradictions will take up much airtime this evening. Too shrill....dontchaknow.

Little mention, I predict, will be made about Mitch McConnell's "top GOP priority is to destroy Obama's presidency", statement. Instead, all the Serious Professionals will tell us how the newly elected Republicans will be oh-so-willing to work with our Kenyan overlord.....that is, if the Kenyan overlord doesn't insist on following the lead of the "professional left", you know, something Obama has never done.

If you would like to play a drinking game this evening.....and god knows alcohol will be needed.....take a big swig every time you hear the phrase "Obama will now have to move to the right", or it's equivalent. I don't recommend doing this alone, because someone will most likely have to pick you up off the floor before the evening is over.

Already the establishment players, even those who sometimes play the role of progressives on the teevee, are blowing.........the trumpets of Queen Sarah's ascension to the President TeaBagger throne. Those "limp, impotent, bastards", as Wasilla's conservative Christian Queen Bee calls them, will be compelled tonight to kiss the former beauty queen's ass with complimentary language about the "grassroots" movement she and her sidekick Glenn Beck have championed.

Little, however, will be mentioned about the Bagger Queen's penchant for Islamophobic breakouts, her pettiness, or her quitting of the Alaskan governor's job after only 18 months, not to mention, and they won't, the fact that the amount of information inside Queen Bee's tiny brain wouldn't fill a thimble. Oh, no....Villagers need access....and how can they gain access to America's new Queen without cloning themselves to look like Sean Hannity? Let me tell you how....they must kneel before the Anointed-Against-Demons One.

Tonight the Villagers will begin to do just that. Though it won't be pretty to watch.....groveling rarely is.....listen and watch for it tonight in coverage of the midterm results.

Another thing to listen for this evening will be the confessional-like sobriety feigned by Villagers as they extrapolate the 10 million, or so, reasons why Democrats simply can't connect with American voters anymore. The "everything is bad for Democrats" crowd of "reporters", the same people who determine what stories will be pushed every day, will wonder often tonight why Democrats couldn't get their "message" out. And they'll be extra-stone-faced Serious when they do.

I'd suggest another drinking game on that one....but I'm thinking the "Obama will have to move to the right" game will provide significant inebriation to get you through the night. Mileage varies.

Another thing to listen for tonight will be the noise over close races. While it looks like we'll know the larger picture by later tonight, many individual races will not be decided by tonight. One such race is the Alaskan Senate Odd-a-thon. Alaska gathers their ballots up with teams of, like, dog sledders, or something....so we won't know anything much about Alaska's close race for the Senate until.....hell, I don't know, the spring tundra thaw?

Other very close Senate and gubernatorial races may happen in Illinois, Washington State, West Virginia, Ohio, and Florida. Numerous House races, perhaps dozens, are expected to be nail-biters......the Boccierri-Renacci race is one in Ohio. Pay attention to the reports of poll-watcher action in these races. Especially to accusations of Democratic voter fraud or those pesky "irregularities" that only Democrats try to get away with. Listen for how often the name ACORN is heard and the New Black Panthers. WARNING: I don't advise playing a drinking game over those last two if you are watching Fox. That would be considered binge drinking.....something I'm against on totally religious grounds.

And finally....enjoy yourself. Have some fun, you know, in a Titantic-orchestra-playing-while-the-ship-is-sinking kind of way. Take comfort knowing that as your country declines, you were there to witness the rise of the Greatest Patriotic Group ever in America's history.

The TeaBaggers.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to make a trip to the liquor store.

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