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Who Is The Most Loathsome Of 2007?

By The Reverend Published: December 30, 2007


Every year at this time lists are made. Top fifty this and top one hundred that. It's all a bit silly, really, but it's what we do.

I found a list that I kind of like. It's found here.

The fifty most loathsome people for the year 2007. Gotta' love a list like that. And each winner receives a "sentence" instead of, you know, some stupid statuette or something. Here's a few entries I particularly enjoyed....

39. John Boehner

Charges: A Tom Delay disciple of shameless hypocrisy, Boehner won't stop weeping openly on the House floor -- real crying, from his tear ducts. It's not passion; it's the pathetic noontime inebriation of an obvious, documented alcoholic. Job title, "Minority Whip," is ironically hilarious. Bound by ideology to destroy nation.

Exhibit A: His name is Boner.

Sentence: Afflicted with voodoo hex that makes him cry poisonous spiders.

21. David Vitter

Charges: And yet another family values Republican and Clinton-basher gets his glass house blown in. A staunch marriage defender and abstinence promoter who paid $300 an hour for his favorite hooker? The only surprise there is that he's still hanging around the Senate, but then again, he did say he was sorry. Denies evolution, yet was still compelled by his primate DNA to spread his seed far and wide.

Exhibit A: According to some, Vitter was nicknamed "the sh*tter" by Canal Street whores for his predilection for diaper play. Wholesome!

Sentence: Wife follows through on that Lorena Bobbitt comment she made during the Lewinski scandal.

16. Chris Matthews

Charges: Calling his show "Hardball" is like rechristening ping-pong "Thermonuclear Warfare." Displays the slurred, unmodulated speech and unfocused antagonism of an aggrieved middle-management drunk. Can read a scurrilous political attack into any paragraph at twenty paces. Continues honing his pointless questions as his guests attempt to answer, cutting them off with an affected imperial weariness when their responses are insufficiently inane. Apparently ignorant of the implications of satellite technology, Matthews shouts louder at geographically more distant guests. Has repeatedly called Ann Coulter "brilliant." Referred to Gerald Ford's yuletide demise as the former president's "Christmas card to the country." Unable to laugh like a normal human, Matthews compensates by simply shouting "ha!"

Exhibit A: "This country is based on generalizations!"

Sentence: Hillary's White House Press Secretary and personal toilet steward.

Hillary makes the list and of course, the Dynamic Dunderf*cks, George W. Bush and Richard Cheney.



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