It was bad enough that Goodyear’s airspace was invaded over the weekend by both the MetLife blimp and the Bud blimp. Now this.
Akron’s corporate giant has started redoing the roof at the Innovation Center, formerly known as the Tech Center, formerly known as Plant 2.
Big cartons of rubber roofing material were delivered by truck late last week. Soon after their arrival, spray paint was used to obscure the name of the manufacturer. But if you looked closely enough, you could spot the logos down in the stacks:
This was going on at the same time the whole sporting world had its eyes focused on Firestone Country Club and a tournament named Bridgestone, covered by television cameras from a non-Goodyear blimp.
Lord have mercy.
Bob: I was reading the Miss Manners column in [Friday’s] Beacon Journal. I didn’t know she gave that kind of advice. Check it out.
Paul: Wow. Miss Manners is certainly branching out.
The headline on the column read, “Surgery is one option to treat hemorrhoids.” Miss Manners wrote at length about issues involving the “anal canal,” as she put it, noting that surgery was the “definitive treatment.”
No word about which side of the operating table the surgeon should place the scalpel.
Update: Sorry to ruin the fun, Paul, but I’m told the newspaper made a production error and the column should have been attributed to syndicated medical writer Dr. Keith Roach.
Bob: I’m not sure who I should ask about this, so I thought I would send it in your direction.
Every Saturday, my 2-year-old daughter insists on visiting Acme No. 1 on West Market Street so she can watch the animatronic cow in the dairy department moo and ring her bell.
Here is our question: The name tag below the cow’s neck says “Elsie,” but the sign near the button that activates her says “PRESS to hear Milka the cow ‘Mooooo.’ ”
Is Elsie filling in while Milka is on vacation? Is Milka Elsie’s nickname? Can you help find an answer to this mystery?
Rob: Sounds like a nasty case of identity theft. I think Elsie needs to contact the Federal Trade Commission immediately. Apparently, the cow has fallen victim to a phish.
Timing is everything
We last heard from Tom Fritsch when the AARP was relentlessly trying to recruit his late father, who would be 109 if he were still capable of paying membership dues.
Bob: The AARP apparently is now spreading a rumor that my 109-year-old deceased dad needs to retire. He has received a solicitation from Creative Retirement Planning LLC [in Akron] inviting him to join them for “FREE Fun and Laughter” at the Venue on Tallmadge Circle on Aug. 15 or 20.
He retired in 1968.
Tom: This will indeed require some “creative retirement planning.” Can’t wait to hear what they have in mind!
Bob: I went to Steak ’n Shake today and didn’t get a spoon with the table setting.
I ordered a side of coleslaw with my burger. The waitress brought the slaw right away with a spoon, which I had not asked for.
Slaw is not a food I would normally use a spoon to eat, so I thought this was a little strange. It was “creamy coleslaw,” so I guess that was the reason for the spoon.
Anyway, I just thought I would let you know of another spoonless table-setting restaurant.
Love your column. I read it online since moving to Michigan.
Michael: Although I’m hesitant to acknowledge anyone from Michigan with football season on the horizon, I think I have a legal obligation to do so now that this spoon thing has crossed state lines.
Who’d a thunk this was such an issue? Readers continue to bombard me with spoon stories more than two weeks after my column about a woman who was angry that Bob Evans no longer automatically supplies spoons with their forks and knives.
This Steak ’n Shake scenario clearly required a tough judgment call on the part of the waitress. I will have to watch the replay before I can comment.
Bob Dyer can be reached at 330-996-3580 or firstname.lastname@example.org.