Oh, my. I had hopes for Billy Crystal and they were swiftly dashed. The movie montage, which made Crystal's Oscar-hosting rep, has gotten tired and too chummy. The monologue wastired. The musical number -- well, you can't fault Crystal for energy.

"Hugo" wins for cinematography. OK.

"Hugo" also wins for art direction. Guaranteeing big ads touting it as a multi-Oscar winner.

 "The Artist" wins for costume design.

"The Iron Lady" wins for makeup.

Cameron Diaz and Jennifer Lopez decided that what the ceremony needed was a shot of their backsides. And not even that liviened things up.