Sirius/XM radio is like the Hotel California: You can check out any time you’d like, but you can never leave.

That’s the obvious goal of the bullies who now boast 30 million subscribers.

Ever tried to cancel their service? Prepare for battle.

On their website, you can do just about anything radio-related — change your programming ... switch subscriptions between radios ... add online access ... change your billing information ... you name it.

But there’s one thing you simply cannot do: cancel your service.

Canceling is possible only by phone. And the website gives you the number grudgingly. When you finally find the right button, it asks whether you are “considering” canceling your service.

Fully expecting a sales pitch, I immediately and firmly told the rep who answered that I wasn’t looking for a better deal or different programming. I just wanted to cancel.

My voice grew louder as the number of offers kept growing. When she finally gave up, she said she needed to put me on hold to go get a cancelation number.

Yeah, right. Like that number wouldn’t show right up on the computer she was using to look at my account information.

Total amount of time between “hello” and “goodbye”: 7:56.

I was considering rejoining somewhere down the line, but I think I’ll go with The Sound of Silence.

Smoky situation

Bob: I was excited when I read the headline “Goodyear, Bridgestone create joint distribution,” because I read it to mean “Goodyear, Bridgestone create distribution of joints”! Then I read the rest of the story.

What a letdown.

Robin Reid

Fairlawn

Robin: I suppose that would be more efficient than the current distribution system. But I haven’t heard any complaints about shortages.

Haute couture

Bob: Headline in [Saturday’s] ABJ: “Walmart may ease dress code.”

My first thought was, “How is this possible?”

Further reading disclosed that the easing affects employees.

The customers’ sartorial splendor will remain unchanged, and Walmart will continue to be a fun place to shop.

Frank King

Wadsworth

Frank: That’s kinda mean. I kinda like it.

Bob Dyer can be reached at 330-996-3580 or bdyer@thebeaconjournal.com. He also is on Facebook at www.facebook.com/bob.dyer.31